“I was told once that you know you’re an adult [you’ve Come of Age] when you know how you liked your eggs cooked.”
When you hear the phrase coming of age you think about becoming an adult. That rite of passage when a child is no longer a minor. Thoughts of freedom, responsibility, rights, and maturity come to mind, right?
Well, what if that isn’t the only time we come of age?
What if we get to keep coming of age throughout our life?
Coming of Age…Over, and Over, and Over Again…Forever
(if you’re lucky)
Indulge me…
I don’t know about you but I had many times in my life where I have had growth spurts; rich life experiences that pushed me into new phases of awareness, wisdom, and clarity. Each one of those made me feel like ‘oh! Now I’m an adult.’
I have had them physically at all different ages, professionally at many different crossroads of my career, spiritually for sure, and a multitude of relationship teachers that carried me into a new space in my life. I look at all of these moments as coming of age.
My twenties were filled with opportunities that allowed me to get into deeper relationship with my Self. My thirties were extraordinarily complicated and wonderful with life experiences that brought me to my knees in joy and pain. My forties, I would have to say, were my most profound years of spiritual growth and gathering of life’s wisdoms. As I just turned the corner into my fifties I can say that they have already changed my lens of perception to oh-so many things.
EARLY ADULTHOOD
This is a time of life when very little is normative. It is a period of frequent change and exploration that covers many aspects of their life: home, family, work, school, resources, and role.
~State Adolescent Health Resource Center
Continual Growth
What I am touching upon is the realization that we never actually come of age and then that’s it, we arrive and we are of age. I think the beauty of this human experience is that we can continually redefine ourselves, choose how to live, determine what means what to us, and make minute and radical changes to enhance our time here.
If we come of age when we are young and turn a corner into adulthood and are now crowned an adult, then what? That can’t be it. How could it be? Looking back on my younger years as an ‘adult’ I giggle at the thought that I felt I knew enough, was independent and could make it on my own! Ha! What was ahead on my path would surely show me the err of my thinking.
But, hey, aren’t we all like that when we are young? That confidence, courage, and innocent independence that soon becomes constantly calling your mother to figure out how to boil an egg, bring by a spare key because you locked yourself out of your first apartment, or helping you decorate because you couldn’t possibly do it on your own.
If that wasn’t it, and I didn’t actually become an adult back then, and it keeps happening then what if we simply forever come of age. What if our entire existence is opportunity after opportunity to evolve, discover, apply new thinking to our lives, inquire as to who we are and how we want to live and be?
10 Questions to Ask As We Constantly Come of Age
1. Am I living the life I want to live right now?
2. Is there anything I want to change about how I live my life?
3. What does my body need now?
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4. What foods do I need, what exercises are best for who I am now?
5. Are my relationships bringing me joy still?
6. Do I like where I live? Would I be happier elsewhere?
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7. Who am I right now?
8. What time is best for me to go to sleep now that I am this many years old?
9. Are there things in my life I should take a look at and think about doing differently?
10. Does the life I’m living truly serve me and align with my current beliefs, wishes, and dreams?
I know, for me, I had some interesting answers to these questions. I have often thought I had my life trajectory set and I knew exactly what the future would be, who I was, and what I liked. But guess what? It changed, and it keeps changing. That’s the magic of this whole thing.
I say, live your life with radical permission to change your mind, discover who you are day to day and don’t make any proclamations about anything but instead just do it and be fully present in it while you’re in it because you might make a turn and then you’re somewhere else and the view is even more magnificent than you could have ever imagined.
MIDDLE ADULTHOOD
Central tasks during middle adulthood can include maintaining healthy life patterns, raising children or in some way helping future generations, being proud of one’s accomplishments, or taking care of aging parents.
~LUMEN Boundless Pscychology
How Do You Like Your Eggs?
I was told once that you know you’re an adult when you know how you liked your eggs cooked. I heard this decades ago and I have thought about it all the time; wondering if today was the day or not.
Well, I like my eggs all different ways and the day has never come. I must still not be of age yet. Thank God! ☺
Do you know how you like your eggs cooked?
Share your thoughts on this topic and tell me if you think you come of age once or many time throughout our lives. Whatever your thoughts are, find ways to come of age over and over again in your life.
You deserve it!
Sending you love and blessings.
Love,
Dove
Dove Rose
Dove’s boutique studio, Dove’s Bodies, has been an LA institution for more than 35 years. With a background combining decades’ worth of studies in fitness, dance, pilates, martial arts, primal movement, yoga, pranayama, organic nutrition, energy healing, mindful living, intuitive clearing and meditation, Dove is sought out for her unique, intuitive wholistic total-body approach. Dove’s life passion is to guide her clients on their own unique path to wellness, wholeness, and the full integration of mind, body and spirit.
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Thank you AJ.
Thought provoking read. I agree that we are forever evolving, as we should be. Change is inherent in the dynamics of life and relationships that we develop, nurture, and, at times, have to let go of. I don’t think it is necessarily good to ever “become of age” because that, in and of itself, implies that we have finally “become”; we have self-actualized and are therefore done growing. That is not good because we, and everything around us, is in a state of constant change. The idea is to try to move forward more often than we fall back. I, too, have no idea how I like my eggs… It really depends on the day, my mood, my cravings. And no way is any better than any other way. Once we realize this, really internalize it, we then are able to make room within ourselves for deeper change and more significant and meaningful growth.
Oh Lea, what beautiful words. You should write an article about your comments on my article! You are so wise. Your clients and loved ones are blessed to know you and have your wisdom bestowed upon them. Thank you for taking the time to read this and join me in my shares. Your words resonate deeply for me. Sending you blessings.
Dove….you are so wise! You are able to articulate so much of what i go through. Thank you for the 10 steps. Wisdom that i will cherish
And words to live by!
Jami Gertz
Oh Jami, thank you. I am so happy to hear my words landed on you so profoundly. I hope you know that I am always here walking the talk right along side you. Sending love and blessings now, and always.