With the beginning of the year, I’m thinking about “trust.”
Trust is a magical word, just as the beginning of a new year is a magical time. There are elements of hope in them both. They both encourage one to believe that good things are coming. Trust gives you a solid base from which to leap forward into the future.
Trust isn’t just a magical word but creates magic in what it does. When people trust one another, they are open with each other. They communicate better and work together better. They are more willing to forgive one another and to compromise with one another in order to reach a common goal. Trust and magic go hand in hand.
Because it is such a powerful word, trust can be a difficult thing to do. Yet we can build the magical power of trust by working with it in small ways.
When my dad would speak with someone he hadn’t seen in a long time, he often would say something like; “I trust all has been well with you” or “I trust you are feeling fine.”
It was an odd way to put it, I thought, rather than saying; “I hope you’ve been well” or “Are you feeling better?”
But I began to see a correlation between the people he said this to, and those he’d greet in a more traditional way. My dad was a man of faith, and a pastor, and he prayed for many people throughout his life. Those he used that word “trust” with most often were ones he’d also been praying for. He was expressing the fact that he trusted his prayers had been heard and answered positively. And he was saying it out loud to help confirm it.
I saw that when simply asked the question of “how have you been?” or stating a sentence with “I hope you’ve been well” often led the other to first speak of negative things, to invalidate the hope or immediately focus upon their pain. It’s like as humans (or perhaps in our society) we are indoctrinated into thinking that the only news worth sharing is bad news, even when it comes to our own lives. So when asked the question, it’s the first thing that comes out.
But somehow the use of that one little word “trust” made it a statement rather than a question, and caused them to shift their perspective and want to respond in the positive first, even if the negative was hiding right behind it. More often than not the person would usually at least start their sentence with; “Oh yes! Things have been much better!” even if they’d go on to include an “although” or “but” in there to discuss what still may have been difficult in their lives. It caused them to at least start their thoughts and responses with a positive affirmation validating my dad’s trust.
Is it because we innately don’t want to betray another’s trust in us? Is it because if we hear someone trusts something then we are more inclined to trust it as well? Is it because we believe someone when they say they trust something?
All of these, really. So when my dad said he was trusting that something was good for these people, they believed it to be true. And so they focused on that first, before allowing themselves to go into a place of anxiety, pain or fear. And often enough, it actually distracted them from even considering those more negative emotions or thoughts and led them directly into viewing themselves through a positive lens.
It caused me to see the power that trusting someone or something can have not only for yourself, but for the others as well. By trusting in another, or particularly trusting in ourselves, we can positively influence and even change habits, patterns and behaviors. We can accomplish goals and realize resolutions. We can, perhaps, even find ourselves making our greatest dreams come true.
All of this, with just a little bit of trust.
Rather like magic.
So I am thinking that if I were to skew the word “hope” or “resolve” with the word “trust” in making plans for the new year, perhaps it might more positively influence my life as well. After all, when I trust myself to do something, it isn’t even a question. I just do it. It’s only when I say; “I hope I can…” that it becomes a question. Even a resolution isn’t much good without being able to trust yourself to keep that resolution. What I need is to trust that I won’t let myself down.
There is a lot I am having to trust in this coming year.
At this point in my life, it is a blank slate. So the first thing I need to trust is that what I’ll be writing on that blank slate will not be something like; “Whoops! My bad.” It will instead consist of words like; “Whoopie! My good is here!”
I am a freelancer, but I have no specific jobs lined up. I have no specific plans lined up. Since my bank account is at nearly nothing, I am going to have to find something to bring money in, and I have no idea what or where to start. But I am trusting that I will figure it out. And that it will be something good. Because I always do, and it always is in the long run.
My health was compromised in the past couple of years. Even as I write this I am fighting yet another cold that’s come on due to a long-compromised immune system. Yet I am trusting I will continue to get healthier, and eventually back to normal this year. Because I’ve been working toward that goal.
I have many friends and family who are going through some rough times – cancer, career changes, deaths in the family, losing homes in the recent fires… it’s been a hell of a year. While I can’t change their circumstances or their lives, I can be there to support them through it as best I’m able. So I am trusting that I’ll be there for them, and continue to help them in any way possible. I trust I’ll help them to find their laughter and remember their love even in the darkest times.
I am trusting in this coming year to bring many positive things to many people.
Jeanette Elaine Dubois
Jeanette is a film & tv editor, writer, director and producer who’s worked on Emmy & Telly Award winning shows, movies, and music videos for a variety of networks. She’s also a trained operatic who mostly sings to her cats now, though sometimes she expands her audience to her family & friends. She loves gardening, good books, good wine, and good conversations, preferably all at the same time.
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